... or the Prodigal Son Returns...
It's funny to me how easily time passes. Joy is now 8 months old. She is going to be walking and talking in no time. I can already hold her hands and help her walk. By "walk" I mean, I more or less provide the motive force and balance and she moves her legs and feet back and forth to simulate a walking motion. Walking. Geezis. She is still taking 3 (ish) naps a day and I still have some "me time". But the time is getting less and less mine... Sort of.
The business I was in for lo these many years has a network associated with it; in other words, I have (had) a reputation, and it was more or less widely known in my circle of communications technicians and their customers. I am known by lotsa people. People who really aren't known by anyone else. So, if I am popular amongst those that are not, am I really popular? Well that's a subject for another day. Where I was going with this is, sometimes I hear from those people who know me and my abilities, as I did just recently. I received a phone call from someone who needed my expertise for some projects he was doing. He runs his own business, and it's doing okay, and he remembered me, so he decided to give me a call. The work he needed me to do was certainly "in my wheelhouse", so my ability to perform the tasks was not in question. But that's not my job, is it? No. It's not. I had to tell him that I could provide some consulting and maybe some design or commissioning data, but as far as "boots on the ground" type work, I was out.
I discovered I had turned a corner. Up until that point, anyone who had contacted me to do some work (and there were a few), I had more or less just led on and not committed to anything because I couldn't commit to a service level, but I also was not ready to admit I was out. I was not ready to admit to anyone, myself included. Until now. Well, a few days ago. How does that saying go, "the scent is starting to come off the rose"? I think that's happening. It's ok. I have a job. I don't need another.
I was talking to my wife the other day about this. Do I miss the workplace and such. The answer is yes I do, but to be honest, I can't decide what about it I miss. Is it the regimen of the 9-5? Is it the camaraderie of other people? Is it the 'away from home' factor? Is it the pay? Is it the professional satisfaction of a job well done? I could go on, but I won't. The truth is, I have no idea exactly what I miss, but I miss it. I honestly do. In fact, I missed working so much I found myself spending all my "me time" today researching Internet marketing. I'm reading about Google's Ad Words, Ad Sense embedded advertising, etc etc. Really kinda boring stuff. But if one is to start a web-based business one has to know how to market it right?
I don't know if I am going to go back to work. Let me rephrase. I don't know when I am going to go back to work. I don't know if I can start a business. Let me rephrase. I don't know if I can start a web-based business. I think I'm going to try though. There's alot of people selling alot of crap out there. Surely, someone is making some money somehow. I just have to figure all that out. Surely it is that simple right?
It's really, really hard to slow down as much as you have to to raise a small child. Your world suddenly becomes so small, and your brain doesn't know how to handle it. The weird thing is, when this is over and you have to rejoin society, you'll wonder where this time went. Funny world, huh?
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